birdsong

by Tommy

Okay so I have a not-so-secret love of all those “Dream” tags around this town.

I’m not sure but De La Vega seems the likely writer, although he has said that after being arrested he doesn’t do graffiti anymore. Either way I think he’s kind of the jam, his sort of street artist proverb thing he’s got going on, moving from Spanish Harlem to the Ivy Leagues and back, and especially his philosophy regarding being one’s own validator and creating value for your work yourself– D.I.Y. in a nutshell.

I started keeping track of my “Dream” encounters in the summer of 2007, which was of course the summer Paps and I started recording stuff together (back then I couldn’t even touch GarageBand we used Quicktime) and the summer I renounced my future career in medicine/medical sociology for more artistic pursuits (Peter Pan). I noticed this wall on my walk between our apartments–

OK lets be honest I was not dating the best caliber of dudes (never have I ever I guess), and I was getting dumped so often that I had a “getting over” mix on my ipod (it started off with Sade and ended with Kelly Clarkson [btw I'm a CATCH ppl are just FLAKES]). The wall was reading my mind! And even though I happen to believe in witchy shit, it sort of freaked me out that as I processed I would see new phrases –

to

(I drink)

to finally, outside of San Loco–

The walls were processing with me. And then one day, months or maybe even over a year later, I realized that the “Do Not Fall in Love” wall was–

–blank.

And I was pregnant (j/k its my backpack! lolololz).

I’m sort of a late bloomer, and even though I flirted with Riot Grrrl in high school nothing about D.I.Y. really stuck. It was only that summer when Paps and I started to record our songs that I really began learning the benefit of doing things to do them; not needing a recording studio; publishing myself instead of waiting six months to get rejected by some literary journal that doesn’t even publish stuff I like. Whatevs man we got birdsongs now so fuck you mountain of rejection letters.

Last weekend I started noticing the tags again, for the first time in a long time maybe a year even.

First–

to (with Paps)–

I don’t know yet what they’re telling me this time, only that I feel on the cusp of something really great and special and exciting. Considering that De La Vega wrote:

“I started to write inspirational quotes on the ground as a way to give people hope. I wanted to encourage others to really think about themselves and their dreams. I believe that you can be whatever you want to be. It will take a lot of hard work but great things do happen. Become your dream.”

He is so positive! and I would say his intended effect is not lost on me. Growing up on a reservation doesn’t really engender too much hope, I mean its engineered that way. I think thats true too if you’re a woman or gay or a person of color or poor (or all of those!) etc. So feeling this way, creating your own value, is subversive and confusing and empowering. And making zines or Garage Band tracks and imovies and all that, pushing outward in all directions, is that’s expression. And now that I think about it, the new “Dream”s I’ve been noticing are just this.

so without further ado I present to you—-

“a day in the ocean with blood” (all I did was eat a banana and feed the cat [and almost throw up] the rest is the genius of Paps btw our techno band name is Paps Peaks)